Can I Still Have A Baby Shower?

You may be wondering if you can have a baby shower with a prenatal diagnosis and the answer is YES!  Your baby is not defined by their diagnosis and could even prove the medical doctors wrong.  Every life, no matter how brief it may be, should be celebrated (whether privately or with a shower).  

You may experience friends, family, or co-workers asking if they can throw you a baby shower (perhaps they don't even know about the prenatal diagnosis).  The thought of having a baby shower may bring you to your knees crippled with anxiety.  How are you supposed to "enjoy" a celebration for your baby knowing that you may never get to use any of it?  The idea of coming home to a nursery filled with broken dreams is difficult to comprehend.  You feel robbed of the excitement, joy, and eager anticipation for all of the milestones during pregnancy and the future to come.

Ultimately, it is up to you if you want to have a baby shower; there is no right or wrong answer. However you choose to celebrate your baby, we know it will be perfect.  If you choose not to have a baby shower, it does not make you "less of a parent" or mean you do not love your baby.    All of your decisions are made out of love and that is all that matters at the end of the day.  You know what is right for you and your baby and there is no need to cause additional stress during your pregnancy.

With Abigail being our third blessing, we did not have a baby shower as we had everything we would need for a baby.  However, we thoughtfully picked out a set of baby blankets, stuffed animal, a few preemie onesies, and special items to make keepsakes.

Below you will find examples of baby shower ideas that you may find helpful:  

• Traditional Shower -  Everything you ever dreamed a baby shower would be for your little love.  After all, you have just as much right to experience all of the milestones during pregnancy like any healthy pregnancy.  Register for baby items to your heart's desire, plan those silly games, enjoy a day where everything feels right and perfect in the world.  

• Non-Traditional Shower - The host would provide guests with a list of your favorite places (grocery, fast food/delivery, restaurants, gas) and ask for them to bring a gift card; or a list of items that could be used to create memories such as hand/foot print mold kits, memory/shadow box, handmade blanket/hat/booties, ink pads, photo frames/books, or heart beat recorders.  The host could also include a note stating "no baby-related items requested at this time".

• Prayer/Dedication Shower - A wonderful way to have a gathering of women (and men) come together to celebrate and pray for your baby.  An example of a prayer shower would be having an opening prayer (possibly led by the host or another guest); you share an update on your baby, your feelings, hopes, and care plan; one by one, each guest shares a prayer, scripture, poem, or inspirational quote; closing prayer (led by host or another guest).  You always have the right to request no gifts.  

• Book Shower - Celebrating the life growing inside you by registering for baby books or requesting your guests to gift their favorite baby book.  This will give you an opportunity to read to your baby every night and have wonderful memories to cherish and comfort you.